Wednesday, August 27, 2008

Hello always means good-bye

Tomorrow afternoon the van will be packed to the brim, the dog will be at the kennel and our long awaited trip to Montana will begin. I can hardly wait. Sort of.

As I posted once before, I don't want to say hello to my kids and my extended family because I then have to endure the pain of saying good-bye. Sometimes, it just seems easier to not have to do the hello part. But, if I always keep my self from the pain of good-bye, my life would not know the joy of all the memories between hello and good-bye.

I know you all must think I am a little imbalanced in all of this, but I am telling you, I have never, never known pain like the pain of this last year with two of my four children moving away. I still cry regularly. Like Tuesday morning for whatever reason, when I stepped out of the shower it hit me. Tears of sadness, knowing that in one week from that day, I would be back home again feeling the loss and trying to regroup. Oh, I just don't want to think about it.

My sister-in-law, Jeanie, told me tonight that I need to remember that when we calculate the future, we must not forget that God will be there. And that is my only comfort. When I return to my dwelling place next week, facing the emptiness of my heart, God will be there to fill it. How do people live without the presence of God in their life?

"He who dwells in the shelter of the most high, will rest in the shadow of the almighty. I will say of the Lord, He is my refuge and my fortress; my God in whom I trust." Ps. 91:1,2


j said...

We're so blessed to live in a world where we can stay in constant touch and travel so freely. But mostly, to know that there is no distance between us in heart and love, to know that God is with us and also with the ones we love, near or far.

Hope you come home full full full to the brim with togther memories!

Jeanie said...

YOU have won the I LOVE YOUR BLOG award...see my blog for details!